What I've Learned in 26 years.....©

Online Fiction Writing Classes, Writing Clubs, Book Clubs, Portable MFA’s in Creative Writing, Writing books on Ipod: It’s me vs. an ancient laptop, a progressively monotonous career, and straight up fear that I’ve nothing to say. I’m on a mission now, attempting to conquer years of floating aimlessly down a river of indecision only to land up in a fat loft, with a well paying job, material comforts, health care, 401k’s, and match.com. All resources are being tapped. Weekends are becoming filled with literature, lofty pursuits of delusions, late nights in cafes, and plenty of solitude. Supposedly this is the way out. Supposedly the road less traveled is drifting by as soul and soles head towards some celestial calling. My goal: to wake up psyched for work, heart thumbing, creative bass thumping, a pen in one hand, a pad in the other. Lead me into temptation and deliver me stories. And in the interim, I’ll continue to squeeze “smoke breaks” from the man during which I’ll realize that I’m not being paid to believe in the power of my dreams…yet.

What I’ve Learned (part 1)
Jobe
27 y/o Civil Engineer
Chicago, IL


1. If the World Cup were held every year, war would begin to lose its audience.2. God created republicans to keep kids off drugs.

3. We're all painters. Life is our canvas. Here's a brush and some paint. You're welcome to tune into that curly haired dude on PBS if you need any further instruction.

4. O.nly H.andle I.t O.nce. A.D.D. can be managed by strict implementation of this very acronym.

5. Exercise, love and sex are life's best antidepressants.

6. When life gives you lemons, make orange juice.

7. Literally is the most abused word in the English language, literally.

8. Nine planets in the solar system, nine levels to the Inferno. Coincidence? I think not.

9. Television, the internet, and air conditioning; three human inventions which, when abused, will chip away at humanity's sense of community whose penultimate purpose is to teach the meaning of "for the common good."

10. Steinbeck taught me one of the greatest lessons I shall ever learn, Timshel:Thou Mayest! (Your Choice. Your Chance.)

11. Get in where you fit in, anything less would be uncivilized.